merlins-aprentice posted a comment on Sunday 11th January 2009 5:54pm

Love the story, I forget how many times I have read and reread it, this previous part deals well with a part of the story i can not accept no matter who writes it, I mean simply as a guy who was homeless at 14 I would find it hard to believe that Harry could have known Sirius well enough to grieve so much over, if you think about it both Ginny and Ron and maybe even Hermione would have spent a heck of a lot more time with Sirius than Harry did. Oh well of for then next chapter. thanks for sharing by the way.

Lady Alchymia replied:

Hi there,

It's a good point.   For me, I see Harry's reverence for his relationship with Sirius as being a reverence for the idea  of having someone who wanted him.   Just knowing there was someone who wanted to  love him as a son meant everything to him.   The reality of the relationship, of course, was fairly unhealthy most of the time, with Sirius being moody and Harry feeling he needed to avoid upsetting him.   And that says more about Sirius's mental health than Harry's.   But when it comes to depicting Harry's grief, Harry feels what he feels, regardless of how little we may credit it as being founded in something deep and true.

Thanks for your feedback!

Lady Alchymia

noylj posted a comment on Sunday 11th January 2009 5:23pm

Why is Harry so emo in fanfics?

Lady Alchymia replied:

Good question, but I can only answer for myself.   This chapter (and story) opens with the first two weeks of the HBP year.   In canon, in these two opening weeks of HBP, Harry is depicted as depressed: he's mourning Sirius, he’s sleeping badly, he’s paranoid Dudley is trying to goad him when he isn't, he's not eating, not bathing, and generally not caring if his room looks and smells like the bottom of Hedwig's cage.   He only perks up when he receives a letter from Dumbledore.   From then on, everything changes and he spends the next seven weeks of summer pretty much having fun at the Weasleys.

So, in terms of the *fact* of his depression, I think I'm genuinely on the same page as canon.   But, and of course this makes all the difference, Rowling tells us that Harry is all those things in about two pages whereas I give it a lot more word-count.   I guess there could be two reasons for me doing this.   One reason could be gratuitous, with me just enjoying writing some angst.   The other would be to support my plot.   I daresay it's a bit of both in my case.

Rowling needed to provide a link between book 5 and 6.   Plot-wise, it was enough for her to show Harry shaking off his grief and show him getting excited about supporting Dumbledore (and then to show Harry reacting to circumstances throughout the rest of the year).   Harry's feelings about  Dumbledore are very much more important to the HBP plot than his feelings about Sirius or his family.

For me, the situation is reversed.   The changes in Harry's state of mind about Sirius and the Dursleys and Remus make a difference as to whether the plot works, so I'd be cheating the reader to just say now he feels this and now he feels that without showing how he got to those points.   But -- I can certainly overdo things.   So it's something I should watch out for.   Hope that answered your question!

Kindly,

Lady A

bajab posted a comment on Saturday 10th January 2009 7:40pm

Interesting and engaging, but a bit repetative in places. Well written too.

Lady Alchymia replied:

Thank you kindly!   I do waffle a bit; I'll watch out for that.

Lady Alchymia

csktech posted a comment on Sunday 23rd November 2008 8:24pm

I absolutely love Frank

Lady Alchymia replied:

I'm delighted you like Frank.

Thanks!

Lady Alchymia

webdoc posted a comment on Thursday 13th November 2008 7:07pm

Absolutely fandangtastic

Lady Alchymia replied:

Thanks very much!

Lady A

Mindy posted a comment on Thursday 13th November 2008 3:44pm

Any idea if there are more chapters to this anymore? It's a really good story and I would love to read more!

Lady Alchymia replied:

Hi Mindy,

I'm glad you like the story--thanks!   The summer story is over, but there may be some school year stuff coming.

Kindly,

Lady Alchymia

takon65 posted a comment on Saturday 18th October 2008 5:28am

Hi,

Is this the end of this story? I remember reading it on Ashwinder a while ago, and I really enjoyed it.

I'm also looking forward to you posting Psychomachia, Harry's speech when he picked up the first years was highly enjoyable and one of my favorites in all of fanfiction. I'm looking forward to reading it again.

Thanks,

Sam

Lady Alchymia replied:

Hello Sam,

The summer story is finished, but there are a few threads that would  still be fun to explore, and I hope to do so.   Harry and the first years was really enjoyable to write, so I'm delighted you liked it, too.

Many thanks for your kind thoughts!

Lady Alchymia

prongs307 posted a comment on Thursday 9th October 2008 11:52pm

hey very good story. I'm just wondering is there going to be more? there is so many plot bunnies and good ideas there that I hope u take it further!?!? well hope to hear from u.

Lady Alchymia replied:

Hi there,

Thanks again for your compliments.   I'm delighted you enjoy the story.   I have been travellling for a wee while and haven't been doing much writing of late, but those plot bunnies just won't go away for me either :).   I'm keen to see them come to life too.   "When" is an unknown, I'm afraid.   I do want to write further and hope to have something new  in the coming months.

Thanks so much for your support!

Lady Alchymia

Ray D Elliott posted a comment on Wednesday 24th September 2008 6:42pm

thanks lady a. i love this story hugs!!!!!!!!

Lady Alchymia replied:

You are extremely welcome, Ray!

Hugs right back,

Lady A

Miranda posted a comment on Sunday 21st September 2008 4:39pm

I've really enjoyed your story. You make Harry a really believable teenager. Will you be putting up the next story soon? I started reading it last time and enjoyed it, I hope you'll start soon.

Lady Alchymia replied:

Hi Miranda,

Thank you very much for your compliments.   I'm not sure when I'll be posting next; I've been travelling for a wee while, but I'm keen to get back into that story too :).

Kind regards,

Lady A

martha harris posted a comment on Saturday 6th September 2008 8:28am

Hi,
I loved the ending. I liked the first version for the many scenes and details, but this one flows better. Do you know chapter one is missing, and chapter 27 is listed as chapter 1? When do you think the sequel will be up; maybe this year, or will it take a long time to write?

Wonderful story!!!! :)

Lady Alchymia replied:

Hi Martha,

I'm very glad you enjoyed Awakenings, thank you!   And thanks for the heads-up on the missing chapter (now fixed!).

I made a great many mistakes when I  posted Awakeings in (er, 2005?), but the most fundamental error was to post first draft material.   I didn't know at the time  it was first draft material (it didn't occur to me that there were such things as first, second, third drafts etc), or that first draft  is the custom with fanfiction, I was just having fun writing whatever scenes took my fancy and that complemented  the basic plot.    Which is what most fanfic  writers do, I imagine; Rowling has such a great universe to play in.   I want to be a bit smarter with the sequel, and quell some of my meandering ways.   In terms of when you'll see it ... I get a couple of hours a week to write (usually early on weekend  mornings when the house is still), but I must confess I've been doing more original fiction than fanfiction in the last few years.    Realistically, given the few hours here and there  I can spare for it, I imagine it'll take a year or more to write Psychomachia.   But I definitely do want to finish it, not least because it is one story I'm working on that will actually be  read :).

Best wishes,

Lady Alchymia

Von posted a comment on Thursday 4th September 2008 11:08pm

It's nice to re-discover this old story, but.. I have to say.. this re-write seems...

Perhaps it's simply because I read the original so long ago, but when I read this chapter I got a powerful sense of choppiness, of moments hanging and loose ends stuggling to connect - of butcher surgery, I guess. Partial scenes taken from the old and re-inserted into the new..

It doesn't flow as well.

Of course, as I mentioned, this could be entirely the feeling of a mind that had read the original so much the pattern of the story is firmly engrained, thus creating a sensation of incorrectness when it isn't followed. :) Maybe a brand new reader wouldn't get the sense that it's jumping and starting all over the place.

Lady Alchymia replied:

Ah, the dilemma of second drafts.   Possibly more than any other, this opening chapter, covering the first few weeks at Privet Drive, is radically different from the first draft  (with at least two thirds of the chapter being completely new plot content), and  so many elements in the first draft were simply dropped (no musical  flier, no piano, no box of keepsakes, etc).   Of course,  the re-reader doesn't  know they're dropped, so I can understand how expecting one thing and getting another would be quite distracting.   Thanks for the feedback.

Kind regards,

Lady Alchymia

Jay posted a comment on Wednesday 27th August 2008 2:47pm

Hey,
Okay i owe you a review, you are the most amazingest writer ever, is that even a word? never mind. Anyway i just want to tell you that before stumbling upon your story by mistake when i was 'studying' for my gcse's i would never have dreamed of reading a story about harry potter (i would never hear the end of it from my friends) but for some reason i started reading your story on the website ashwinder (what happened to that by the way?) and i would spend hours and hours reading the story, my parents were so happy thinking i was revising, oh well i can blame you if i get bad results - just kidding (i did good!!). Sorry about the long review but hey at least i didnt declare my never dying love for you, which i must do if you carry on writing stories like this, lol.
Bye Jay

P.S I know you said you dont know when youre going to post the next story, but could you give me an idea, pweaseeee -makes puppy eyes-

Lady Alchymia replied:

Hello Jay,

I think amazingingest is a most delightful word!   Thank you kindly.   Ashwinder?   Ah... after being hacked one too many times I finally gave  up.   Luckily, I'd been offered a spot here on fanficauthors, so here I be.   I kind of miss that site; it was nice chatting with people in a quiet nook.

Congrats on your GCSEs!     I guess that was a while back .   I love messing with people's study plans.  When I was in school there was no Internet (and virtually no  PCs, actually).  

The sequel to Awakenings is Psychomachia, and I'm not sure when it will start posting.   I want to do things a bit smarter and quicker this time.

Many thanks for your feedback,  Jay  :).

Lady A

Jimbocous posted a comment on Monday 4th August 2008 1:29pm

I think you do as good a job as any writer I've seen in capturing the essential confused and conflicted Harry. Really enjoy that, as he seems so much more real in your writing. I still have a vote for seeing Awakenings V1 resurface at some point; wish I'd kept a copy. Flaws and all it was a fun read. Only comment I have on the last chapter was that it would have been good to be refreshed on the prophecy again to see how the final interpretation panned out, as by that time I had forgotten the original text and couldn't recall where it first showed up to reread it. I'd figured out the son part quite a while earlier, but missed the One reference as well, so the significance of the final chapter title was diminished. Anyway, thanks for a great read, and looking forward to the sequel as you begin to post.

Lady Alchymia replied:

Hi there,

Thank you kindly!   The prophecy was repeated at the end of the previous chapter; can't do much more than that, but I understand how hard it is keeping track of details when you read chapters weeks apart and don't have the paperback in your hand to flick back a few pages.   That was one reason the first draft of summer was so long (other than me just being verbose); because the chapters dribbled out piece by piece, I had lots of repetition of clues and restating where people were and who knew what and when they knew it.   I made a conscious choice to try to stop doing that in the second version, and I think it generally makes for a better read once you have the whole novel posted.   Thanks for the feedback, though.

Kindly,

Lady Alchymia

LeprechaunJV posted a comment on Saturday 26th July 2008 8:26pm

Excellent story......
By any chance will there be a sequel.....
Cheers

Lady Alchymia replied:

Definitely a chance :).   Thanks kindly!

Lady A

cronenus posted a comment on Tuesday 22nd July 2008 6:55am

hi, I know I've haven't reviewed in a long time sorry for that, but I have enjoyed the story and am glad to hear you are doing a sequel. ^_^.
I'm looking forward to it posting, until next time may you find the words you need and may they always be great.

Lady Alchymia replied:

Aww, thanks so much!   They're  really  lovely sentiments.

Kindly.

Lady Alchymia  

Wonderbee31 posted a comment on Monday 21st July 2008 9:05am

Great again to see this here, and the wrap up was nice. Narcissa sure came across as a snobbish...witch doesn't she? Fun to see how Hary figured it out, and loved the ending moment with he and Liz, and can't wait to see what chnges might come with the sequel. Great stuff here!

Lady Alchymia replied:

Many thanks for all your feedback over the course of the story.   I'm glad you enjoyed how the end came together.   (Narcissa is very well named lol).

Kind regards,

Lady A

Poirot posted a comment on Monday 21st July 2008 8:37am

Another great story! Thank you so much!

Lady Alchymia replied:

You're very kind, thank you :D.

Lady Alchymia

Alice posted a comment on Monday 21st July 2008 8:08am

I loved it! I liked that you cut out the conversation with Elizabeth and Natalie about Elizabeth staying in England. The only part I missed was Apollo and his mom Leto! I was wondering how they were important to the story...

I'm so glad that you'll be starting on the sequel!! Looking forward to how you spin it, with Harry no longer playing piano.

Lady Alchymia replied:

Hi Alice,

Thank you very much for your feedback!   I was rather fond of that Apollo and Leto bit, too, but we may see them pop up again.   Harry won't be playing the piano, but he'll still be taking Light Arts.   I hope you'll enjoy it.

Kindly,

Lady Alchymia

Layne Rich posted a comment on Monday 21st July 2008 5:34am

I totally love your writing! I'm looking forward to reading the next one also!

Lady Alchymia replied:

Thank you very much indeed!

Lady A