Psychomachia
Chapter 2 — Payback
By Lady Alchymia
Reviews
millie johanson posted a comment on Monday 9th March 2009 2:27am for Chapter 2 — Payback
Hello, I have enjoyed your story and I don't know where your story is going yet I like the fact that the first yrs are brave enough to try to help Harry I hope The Headmaster doesn't make them feel like it doesn't do any good that they all are trying to help Harry.
Also you asked for out comments, Just one will this be a Susan and Harry story?????
Not that I mind as it is your story but I am such a H&G fan It just makes sence she doesn't put up with his bad moods as with the 6 brothers she knows how to handle them. And Harry needs to be handled.
I like Frank too. Some how I thought he liked red heads.
Oh well just like you to know.
Keep up the good work.
Will finish other ch tonight.
Miss Millie
Patches posted a comment on Sunday 15th February 2009 7:07am for Chapter 2 — Payback
Poor Harry. He really ticked off Ron with his little speech to the first years. That was really good by the way. Finding out he was heard by the whole school was quite a shock. Of course Dumbledore found a way to profit by it by giving Harry extra instruction by the means of "detentions". I'm glad let Harry off the hook a little with his "badge". The "Little Prince" in herbology was great. Of course poor Harry goofed again. Oh well. First day of the new term can be interesting! Thanks for writing. I look forward to more of this story. pms
Lady Alchymia replied:
Hi there,
Thanks kindly. I'm glad you enjoyed the Little Prince :). And Dumbledore is never one to waste an opportunity. I hope you enjoy the rest.
Best wishes,
Lady Alchymia
millie johanson posted a comment on Saturday 14th February 2009 6:48pm for Chapter 2 — Payback
Hello again great story Love Frank and the inter action between him and everyone.
I like your story so I'll keep reading, and I love the way you keep Luna popping up and the first yrs.
I love H&G stories, as she is stornger because of the 6 brothers. she puts up with nothing now she is in school and even with H, and he needs someone who cares enough not to be wishy washy.
This is your story............
If I don't like it, I find another. I would never tell and author 'if you don't change it I wont read it' or it could win if you change it. Hr needs Ron as much as she needs him. Harry needs a strong woman in his life.
Keep up the good work.
Miss Millie
Lady Alchymia replied:
Thanks kindly, Miss Millie!
It is hard to see characters you love be messed with. I can't guarantee that this or that ship will sail, but I can promise that wherever I take the romance threads in my stories that the characters will stay as much as possible in synch with their canon personalities. In canon, Ginny is a strong-willed, popular, pretty, talented Quidditch player, and that isn't going to change anytime soon. Hermione and Ron and Harry will be as canon as I can make them whilst still giving them different adventures and challenges for the year. The rest of the characters, like Susan and other minor DA members, are more open to interpretation, and their main purpose is to bring something new and different to the story (since we've all already read the real year 6 story).
I hope you'll enjoy the differences.
Kind regards,
Lady Alchymia
Mrs.TiffanyPotter posted a comment on Saturday 14th February 2009 6:00pm for Chapter 2 — Payback
"Yeah, let’s grow two dozen plants that need to eat people to survive, have paralysing farts, and make you want to hump something."
OMG! LOL. The end of this chapter had me giggling like a twelve year old.
Lady Alchymia replied:
Hello :),
I'm so pleased you enjoyed that ending, thanks!!
Lady Alchymia
DrT posted a comment on Saturday 14th February 2009 12:12pm for Chapter 2 — Payback
Ron is rightly embarrassed, but he's still being a jerk in return.
Lady Alchymia replied:
It's something he's very good at :).
Wonderbee31 posted a comment on Saturday 14th February 2009 7:02am for Chapter 2 — Payback
Great section, and as always, love the character interactions between the gang here, and can't wait for what will happen next time as maybe Frank tries to play matchmaker, and Albus and his dissappointment that he's losing some play with Harry.
Lady Alchymia replied:
Thanks you very much indeed!! Old Albus will be one to watch; he likes to have things done his way, and isn't used to guardians getting in the way.
Cheers!!
Lady A
HGRHfan35 posted a comment on Saturday 14th February 2009 3:48am for Chapter 2 — Payback
Cor, that was so brilliant! I've got stomach ache and, hopefully, more toned abbs after reading this gem. I hadn't heard that Dixie song in years, I must say that I live in a country where only country lovers even heard of them, so I listened to it while reading that bit. LOL.
Poor Ron, he's brilliant in his own way, just not in the obvious way.
The first bit confused me a bit. Frank listening to someone making him, he thinks, nice treats but he hears it through the floor suggesting it's a parselmouth he's hearing, but that does not have to be Harry. Does it. What have you got up your sleeve this time. Frank can wish all he wants about Susan, Ginny's still the one for me. :) Although your Susan is soooo lovely.
The Penis-Plant was brilliant (I saw one 11 years ago in our botanical gardens), they are not really pretty but boy, they really smell horrible. Like mixing skunk, rotten eggs and a decomposing item all together *if you could see my face now*.
My my, this turned out to be quite long. ooops.
Until next time, take care. C
Lady Alchymia replied:
Hi there,
I am dead impressed with the idea of someone getting a six-pack workout whilst reading LoL. Wonderful! I'm delighted you found some fun with that Dixie Chicks song -- thanks so much for sharing that with me.
I'm glad you felt for Ron! And I like the way you think -- he does have his simple but effective moments of inspiration.
I'm afraid that the bit at the begining with Frank is just him hearing Harry when Harry was talking to the first years in the previous chapter. At one point, when the kids cry, 'Nox', and everything goes black, Harry slips down to the landing and talks in Parseltongue to give them a bit of a scare (by reciting his chicken casserole recipe).
I'm so impressed you already knew about the Amorphophallus Titanum! You're right; they absolutely stink LoL.
Thanks so much for your feedback!
Lady Alchymia
brad posted a comment on Friday 13th February 2009 11:53pm for Chapter 2 — Payback
You know, you really are an evil author. Or I'm a masochist. Maybe both.
It's *just remotely possible* that you might recall my one or two or maybe more whinges about how this story could win a literary Nobel prize if you changed it to entail a H/Hr romance. How you write them both so beautifully. How it *hurts* to read them in your novel knowing that Harry only has eyes for the damnable Susan Bones, may there be a pox on her and her bountiful cleavage (if I recall the forthcoming scene in the library. Funny how I, a male, remember things like that).
Still, once I manage to read the chapter I usually assuage the pain by writing a (passionate) review. After venting much of my fury I can then stagger away, at least partially healed from the ordeal of reading a Lady A. update.
So what do you do to me<DEL><DEL> us? Rewrite your story from scratch. Forcing me to peruse it all over again. Suffering anew the almost-but-not-quite-romantic H/Hr you seem to pack into every second page, it seems sometimes. The little signs of closeness - if not intimacy - which just BEGS to flower into a full-blown romance down the track. Argh!!
:-)
I can't help it. You write all of these characters so nicely, their acting their ages so well, it's so entirely *natural* the way you write it ... and entertaining/amusing ... but, due to my fandom H/Hr bias, I can't help but particularly appreciate the interaction of our hero and my girl Hermione. And cry for the H/Hr potential that is going to waste. I need help. Is there a 'H/Hr anonymous' club I can join? I'm free any night other than Wednesdays, that's when I have to attend the SOBS (Sick of Bones, Susan) meetings.
Anyway ... and I'm sure I said this last time ... I just *loved* the 'foot hug', that is just so cute/nice! I couldn't help but note how an 'anxious Hermione' awaited Harry in the common room. Harry's instant awareness of the cessation of Hermione's smile, picking up on the cue to reassure Hector. All these signs that, were I reading a story resident on portkey.org (that noble H/Hr site which keeps the fandom shining bright), would have me wriggling in my seat, squirming with delight, anticipating the romantic climax sure to come and capitalise on all of that prior H/Hr bonding fuel.
I know I'm not deluded, I'm not imagining things. I can't help but see how good these two are for - and with - each other in your story ... even if my natural urge is to want them to discover something else in each other. Wah!!
Other than Harry and my girl it was a thoroughly enjoyable chapter packed with other good stuff. Ron's snarkiness. The 'more clueless' badge is a *classic*. The multi-hued maggots growing on me by the second. A couple of references to Hermione and "her boys", I love that Trio reinforcement. Some lovely Luna ... you take care of her, okay? May I suggest you break up Ron and Natalie, give Ron to Luna - since you're possibly continuing the canon clues from OotP, HBP and DH that she was attracted to Won Won (and he found that she was 'growing on him') - which, oh, surprise! Will leave Hermione available, fancy that ...
> "Harry, *please*!" Hermione begged with remarking sincerity (Harry really thought she should give acting a go).
Is there any chance that she'd forgotten the ploy of detentions and wasn't play-acting? I guess not ... this *is* Hermione, after all, and Harry had told them about it only shortly before. Wow, everything else and she can act too! What a gal!
Was the 'little prince' in the first version? I don't remember any passing of wind that 'knocked out the entire class'. Given that Hermione is in that number I would think I'd have noticed if it was. :-)
I'm also wondering if you have evil plans for the plant's pheromones coming up. I mean, you did naughty things with paint, this seems like an accident waiting to happen! Could any evil author worth her salt let the chance for a botanic barrage of base lust pass her by?
Always glad to see an update from you. Sometimes I get maudlin about some of the fanfics - including a few of the really excellent ones - that have been abandoned, or looking like same. Glad this excellent tale is still proceeding; and thank you as always for your effort in keeping us entertained.
Lady Alchymia replied:
*Chuckles* I do believe the cleavage was modest, but feel free to embellish as you read.
That foot hug is just for you :). I'm so glad you enjoyed the chapter (in spite of missed opportunities with the lovely Hermione). And Luna is always a pleasure for me to write.
I can confirm that Hermione *was* acting. And the Little prince was definitely in the first version (and knocked out the entire class). Have I evil plans with pheromones? You betcha LoL. I love your phrase 'a botanic barrage of base lust'!!
Thanks muchly for the feedback!
Big hugs!!
Farvista posted a comment on Friday 13th February 2009 10:28pm for Chapter 2 — Payback
Ouch! Okay, that last bit made me laught 'til it hurt. Spit wine all over my keyboard...
Lady Alchymia replied:
Excellent!! LoL Thanks for sharing that with me :).
Lady A
mwinter posted a comment on Friday 13th February 2009 9:44pm for Chapter 2 — Payback
Well so far so good. Looking foward to your next posts.
Lady Alchymia replied:
Thanks kindly!! I hope you enjoy the rest of the story.
Lady Alchymia
Lon Huey posted a comment on Friday 13th February 2009 9:13pm for Chapter 2 — Payback
Aw, ya hafta love the little maggots.
Lady Alchymia replied:
You do indeed! LoL Thanks!
beauty01021 posted a comment on Friday 13th February 2009 7:21pm for Chapter 2 — Payback
yeah great chapter can't wait for more so please update again nad soon.
Lady Alchymia replied:
Thanks kindly!
Lady A
Carol Layland posted a comment on Friday 13th February 2009 6:23pm for Chapter 2 — Payback
hello Lady Alchymia, I do like the way you think and write. It seems that this chapter contains a little bit of everything from pathos to comedy and I love it. I guess that Harry needs to learn how to handle children since he got into such a problem with them and now he is hung by his own petard. I do love it. Thank you for this wonderful chapter.
Lady Alchymia replied:
Hi Carol,
Thank you for your lovely thoughts. I must admit to just loving writing Harry and kids. I'd love to write him trying to babysit a few toddlers. You'll want to keep an eye on the young ones :).
Cheers,
Lady Alchymia
Hawklan posted a comment on Tuesday 15th December 2009 8:00pm for Chapter 2 — Payback